Praying for others

How to pray for someone who hurt you

· 2 min read

How to pray for someone who hurt you, what Jesus said about praying for those who wrong us, honest prayers to start with, and how forgiveness grows over time.

The Journal screen in The Pray App with a place to write
The Journal screen in The Pray App with a place to write

To pray for someone who hurt you, start by telling God honestly how you feel, then ask Him to help you forgive and to work in that person’s life. Jesus said, “Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you” (Matthew 5:44). It’s one of the hardest things He asks, and one of the most freeing.

How do you pray for someone who hurt you?

To pray for someone who hurt you, start by telling God honestly how you feel. Then ask Him to help you forgive, and pray for the person’s good, as Jesus taught: “Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you” (Matthew 5:44, ESV). Forgiveness may take time, and it doesn’t mean pretending nothing happened. Keep bringing it to God.

Start with honesty

The Psalms are full of honest prayers about people who caused harm. You can tell God you’re angry or hurt. “Pour out your heart before him” (Psalm 62:8). Honesty is where forgiveness begins.

Ask God to help you forgive

Forgiveness is often a process, not a single moment. Pray, “Lord, help me want to forgive.” Remember how God has forgiven you in Christ (Ephesians 4:32, Colossians 3:13).

Pray for the person

You may need to pray this through clenched teeth at first. That’s still prayer.

A short prayer for someone who hurt you

“Lord, You know what happened and how much it hurt. Help me forgive as You’ve forgiven me. Work in their heart. Bless them, and heal what’s broken in me. In Jesus’ name, amen.”

Forgiveness and wisdom

Forgiving someone doesn’t mean pretending nothing happened, and it doesn’t mean you have to trust them again right away. If you’re not safe, get help and keep wise boundaries. Praying for someone can go together with protecting yourself.

Write it down

A journal helps you see how your heart changes over time. Write the prayer you prayed today. Come back in a month.

The Journal screen with a place to write and a prompt Write honest prayers in Journal and look back on how God has worked.

Keep praying in The Pray App

Make a prayer card for the person and set it to weekly. Write your honest prayers in Journal. See how to start a prayer journal.

The Pray App is free on the App Store.

Questions people ask

Why should I pray for someone who hurt me?

Jesus said "pray for those who persecute you" (Matthew 5:44). Praying for them brings your hurt to God and asks Him to work in them and in you.

What do I say when I pray for someone who hurt me?

Be honest about the hurt, then ask God to help you forgive, to work in their heart, and to bless them. You can start with a short sentence and grow from there.

Does praying for them mean I have to trust them again?

No. Forgiveness and trust are different. You can forgive and pray for someone while still keeping wise boundaries, especially if you're not safe.

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